Why did we want to grow up?!
Remember being a kid and wanting to be an adult so badly?
You couldn’t wait for it.
Freedom.
Independence.
Control.
The ability to make your own decisions.
And maybe most of all…
To feel cool.
Being an adult looked like the finish line.
Like once we got there, everything would make sense.
And now here we are.
Making decisions all day long—some small, some life-altering.
Carrying responsibility that doesn’t turn off.
Managing work, money, relationships, health, kids, expectations - our own and everyone else’s.
The thing we all once wanted now feels way too heavy.
No one really tells you this part.
Adulthood is all about ambiguity.
It certainly doesn’t come with control, it comes with constant tradeoffs.
It doesn’t lead to “figuring it out,” it leads to realizing there is no final version of “figured out.”
You make decisions.
You make a lot of guesses.
And, you get a lot wrong.
And we’re all still wondering:
Why does this feel so much harder than I thought it would?
Am I doing something wrong?
Why am I the only one struggling?
You’re not.
We all feel like this at one point or another.
For a lot of people, especially those who are driven, responsible, and trying to do it “right,” the feelings of doubt and failure are likely more intense.
Life is just…hard and this is what it actually feels like to carry a life.
The people you’re comparing yourself to are carrying it too.
They’re just better at hiding it. I get accused of this all the time. I can confidently tell you, it is a coping mechanism and a front.
If you’ve been feeling overwhelmed, uncertain, and tired in a way that sleep cannot quench…
YOU ARE NOT ALONE
And YOU ARE NOT BROKEN.
You don’t need to go back to being a kid. You just need to stop expecting adulthood to feel easy.
Because when you stop expecting it to feel easy, you stop interpreting “hard” as “failure.”
If this resonates and you feel like you’re failing —this is exactly the work I do with people like you. Let me help. Because most of what you’re feeling? It’s more normal than you think.
👉 Book a 1:1 coaching session with me: https://www.iamfingup.com/get-started
👉 Listen to stories of successful people feeling failure on The F’ing Up Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/@finguppodcast
👉 Or read more in The Art of F’ing Up Newsletter: https://www.youtube.com/@finguppodcast; Subscribe here: http://iamfingup.com/subscribe
I am Deanne Rhynard
I’m Deanne — Success Mentor, former Chief People Officer, and host of The F’ing Up Podcast. I work with people navigating difficult career moments — big decisions, being fired, not getting promoted, and the very real feeling of F’ing Up.
Through 1:1 mentoring and unfiltered conversations on the podcast, I help people gain clarity and move forward with intention. We’ll cut through the noise, get to the root of what’s happening, and turn your feelings of F’ing Up into a catalyst for future success.
Book a single session or a 6-session program if you’re looking for honest perspective and real forward momentum:
📅👉https://www.iamfingup.com/you.
Also, please check out The F’ing Up Podcast in which I interview successful people who share honest, unfiltered stories about the moments their careers didn’t go as planned—the doubt, missteps, and identity shifts behind their success. Each episode pulls back the curtain on what it actually feels like to build a career, beyond the polished narratives we’re used to seeing. Through these conversations, listeners gain language, perspective, and clarity for their own messy middle. Because the truth is—we’re all F’ing Up… most of us just aren’t talking about it!
Watch/Listen via:
▶️ YouTube
🟢 Spotify
